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No New Resolutions?

New year zzzzzz


new year notes.....

Number 1

Don't make a resolution

Instead try sneaking up on that resolution that has self sabotages pre loaded into it and defuse it before you break the resolution, then just do the next best thing about it.

How many New Years resolutions have you made in life so far? 30? 50?

How did it work out? I made one that worked for me. ONE

I resolved that year to stop hurrying. Because it was a source of stress, every day. It revolved around school runs mostly as I recall. In summer, hurrying meant getting hotter and sweating and becoming irritable over nothing. The years have rolled on and yes it made a difference to those years of school runs. I possibly had 15 minutes more sleep each morning. I still don't hurry if I can help it.

Instead I have stop hurrying hacks.

At the time it often culminated in me putting a hat over unbrushed hair, zipping up my jacket over my PJ’s and driving to school looking like I’m dressed. Or a portion of me is, partially.

( I’m up, darn it, just like the rest of you super mum’s )

The jacket over PJ's trick had to stop when my best friend who had the same morning trick, had a car malfunction and had to walk home in bare feet, with bed hair, no bra, ripped PJ pants and an oversized t shirt. Looking like she escaped from rehab or something.

She called me in distress, the freshly lipsticked mums with ironed designer clothing had actually raised eyebrows as they passed. And later called her to ask if everything was alright.

That year her New Years resolution was to never drive to school in PJ's again.

If you’re like me goal setting may not be your strong point. Big goals are easy to set though- it’s like having a giant unreachable star that makes you all the better for the reaching of it.

I have zero problems with these goals, they are in fact inspirations rather than goals. I call them goals though because when it happens I want full credit for having manifested that magic.

Like win a house in the heart foundation lottery. You know , just casually....

I have an automated yearly subscription after all.

Because YAY to the thought of winning! This year, next year, never mind. It has me contributing to a charity while giving myself permission to dream about what that awesome phone call would feel like.

"Hello is that Abby. Yes. I'm just ringing from the heart foundation NZ to tell you that you've won this months lottery !!!!!!!"

I can see myself bouncing up and down with delight, running through the garden to my family, yelling, or will I be whispering? You never know. It's going to be fun to find out just what effect that sort of surprise will have on me...... sigh, where was I

2* Then there are the goals that come from the list of must do’s for the year , they’re also welcome at the new year commencement rituals. I welcome that my partner does it. It exonerates me from having to think about those things. Sweetly he's already scribbled in red pen on an envelope all the sundry’s and repairs and upgrades he’d like to achieve sooner rather than later.

I have no doubt at all that he will tick them all off with a personal satisfaction rating of 10 out of 10

My goals are more nebulous. Gather my thoughts together enough to write about the coaching I offer adoptees and parents of adoptees. Thats the sort of goal that might be an ongoing effort that lasts the rest of the future years of my career.

Somethings you want to always be improving, never leave well enough alone. When it comes to communication skills for example, I am of the opinion that we can always improve our communication skills, no matter how good we’ve become at it.

Of course at the core of it all communication with the Self is key. Which is where I have goals associated with the plans I'm drawing up for an inspired intuition workshop.

Some work is meant to be forever worked upon and re worked

Those things tend to need the baby steps approach.

3* How about I trick my mind into a schedule for the year? Its not the first time I’ve thought of this. What went wrong last time?

Time! Time is what went wrong. And whatever it was that happened next.

People say you need a time line for goals, accountability. Or you wont achieve it they say.

Fiddlesticks. I'll be having none of that. A loose time frame still suits me.

Accountability (particularly as applies to goals with time frames) is probably my least favourite word for last year. I picture it plastered over a colander or sieve. This might tell you a little something about last year. I believe I was not alone......

Diaries are confronting also. They have all this time mapped out into little blocks that fit neatly on a page. Enter the scribbler in various shades of ink.

And so begins the year, with a mad need to regulate my appointments, my work, my home life, my phone calls, with my bodily requirements and the needs and wants of pets and people in my life. In straight lines. In defined boxes. With no wiggle room. Should be easy? Not always.

I feel like it would be marvellous to have a giant blackboard like those at the front of a school room and then mind map it all out. Then theres the harder part- following the plan.

Following it would also require knowing what day of the week it is. Do you ever wake up asking ‘what day is it?’ Routines have never been a strong point. My mum, my adopted mum, was super organised. I found it a bit stifling and as a teenager I found it really boring. So I did what all good teenagers do, I made a life changing decision to NEVER be like that.

Huh, now I’m changing that back, better late than never

So, please please let me know! HOW do you organise your year? What do you do to plan best?

The first thing I do is write everyones birthdays in the diary, and any family plans we might have. Other than that?

It's all about serving my clients and getting the most juice out of the squeeze for them and therefore for me. Because I love helping others traverse the rocky bits and give them the encouragement I know I needed when in a similar place.

If you want to be part of the intuition workshop or would benefit from the work I’m putting together for adoptees and their parents send me a DM

Wishing you a really blessed new year

Don't worry if you haven’t got a resolution, you might want to pick a word for the year instead, mine is empowerment, because that’s what I want to see for my clients and for myself this year, for the world in fact.

Drop me a comment of your resolution or your word for this year so that others can be inspired by you too.

Peace out, Abby


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